Sunday, February 24, 2013

Depression

I'm sinking again.  I kinda knew it would come.  The faces of pity from my loved ones.  The voices of my old friends, they taunt me.  Reminding me over and over again that no one understands.  That they believe I am to blame for my losses.  I am alone.

I can't even take a shower without fighting tears.  The tears overtake me at 2am when I can't sleep.  But crying doesn't help.  It only gives me a head ache.

I am so fragile.  This is why I am secret.  The words of my friends have so much power.  I held it at bay for a while.  But my son got sick.  I stayed home with him for four days.  Just me and him for four days straight, and it caught up with me.  It caught me.

I have recovered from this before.  I can recover from this again.
Posted by at

1 comment:

  1. Lara, you are NOT to blame.
    No one is to blame for depression.
    You are suffering from depression.

    I am *especially* sorry that your "friends" seem to find some divine purpose in the pain. How can they feel smug about suffering? It makes absolutely no sense.

    Let's not talk about that now...
    Most importantly, Please know that I understand, I get it, and I sincerely care about you. I have been there. You are not alone.

    You can email my privately anytime!!!!
    And, even if you don't email me, I am still here...

    Your friend.

    ReplyDelete

Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)