So my husband and I had a wonderful evening on Thursday. We shared a romantic dinner with table cloth and flowers and left-overs with our kids. =) Then we put the kids to bed and we talked. We talked about God mostly. He is a theist. It's so interesting because when he talks about his belief as a theist I can't help but go backward into an anthropomorphic view of God. When I listen to him talk I envision the Grandfather in the sky god, kinda like Zeus. Or I envision Max Lucado's wood carver on the mountain. When he talks about God that is what I hear. He doesn't struggle in that way. He can have a theist belief system without it being anthropomorphic. I cannot. We mused about this. We found it interesting, but not troubling. We are two separate people after all, even though we are bound together.
We talked a lot about different views of God trying to imagine what a panentheistic God would be like, as this is mostly what I believe at the moment. We talked about The Force. We talked about people who use the words 'The Universe' in place of the word God. We talked about Ewa, the goddess from The Avatar. We talked about how physics is starting to delve into the realm of philosophy in that all things are energy and there is nothing to create solid matter though we experience solid matter so...what the hell? We talked about how God is indefinable so once we have a clear definition we've fallen short of God. I read allowed to him Fowler's stages of faith. We talked about where we think we are in those stages. We talked about how we long to be at stage six, but what does it mean and what does it look like to be "rooted in the transcendent?"
Then we felt so close to each other and so known and loved that we made love. Then we went to sleep.
The next morning I had a good laugh at us, because we didn't do gifts. He didn't bring me flowers. He didn't read my poetry. We didn't watch a romantic movie or even talk about how much we love each other. Instead he talked theology with me and he didn't shame me and he wasn't scared. He let me read Fowler out loud to him. That is love to me right now. That was my perfect valentine's day. And I realized that we are weird. =) And I'm so happy we found each other.